Respond and I will...

1. Tell you why I friended you.

2. Associate you with something: fandom, a song, a colour, a photo, etc. you know, something degrading.

3. Tell you something I (dis)like about you.

4. Tell you a memory I have of you.

5. Ask something I've always wanted to know about you.

6. Tell you my favorite user pic of yours.

7. In return, you must post this in your LJ.

I miss you. Still.

Don't think I will ever stop, to be honest.

I close my eyes, and atleast once a day, there you are.

Please, please get out of my head.

How bout those updates?

I know, I know, I am lazy.

So, I am living with Luke at the moment. It's good, we live well together. We get along like brother and sister.

I am sitting with my second ever cup of coffee. I had my first one a couple of hours ago. It is rather interesting. I think it is going to take some experimentation before I work out what really works for me.

Sean came down for a week and a half. That was all kinds of interesting. Lots of thinking and stuff to do there.

Premium this weekend. Auggie is coming back, It will be the first time I have played her in person since October. I think that it is going to be a rather emotionally draining game.

So, this update is at the prodding of Andrew, who is a rather demanding task master :P

I am supposed to make this interesting, and I am not sure how...

Been talking to James alot lately, trying to make friends with him again. Been a bit of a new years resolution in fact. Talking to him cheers me up and depresses me at the same time. It is kind of odd like that. Not sure what I will do about it. He never really seems that happy to hear from me. But then, James was never the most expressive person....

I really don't know how to make this interesting.

Oh! I have started to answer that meme, on my characters. The answers are at http://auggiecauldwell.livejournal.com feel free to comment on them. I like comments.

I have glandular fever, which sucks, alot. Has me tired, and in bed alot. On the plus side, I have a couple of people that like to entertain me.

And I really have nothing else to say. *shrugs* Post comments asking me questions, so I can write posts replying to them.

Comments Screened:
I do urge people to answer, I'm curious/intrigued, and I won't hold it against ya/hold you to it, unless you want me to! ;)

1. Your Name:
2. Age:
3. Favorite position:
4. Do you think I'm cute?
5. Would you have sex with me?
6. lights on or off?
7. Would you have to be drunk?
8. Would you take a shower with me?
9. Have you ever thought about having sex with me?
10. Would you leave after or stay the night?
11. Do you like cuddling afterwards?
12. Condom or skin?
13. Have sex on the first date?
14. Would you kiss me during sex?
15. Do you think I would be good in bed?
16. Would you use me as a booty call?
17. Can I use you as a booty call?
18. Can we take pictures of the act?
19. How long would we have sex?
20. Would you tell your friends about me?
21. Will you post this so I can fill it out for you?
22. Can I un-screen your entry if it's cute/funny?

OK, jumping on the Meme train.


Post a comment with a one-word subject and one of my characters. They will post their thoughts and/or rants on said topic.

Characters -

Augustine Skadhisdottir Strife - Nosferatu, Ordo Dracul
Mariella Constantine - Ventrue, Lancea Sanctum, Mendicant
Michelle Pritchard - Ghoul
Jacquie Tayor - Firetouched, Cahalith, ex Iron-Master, Liason of Sydney
Nysa Summers - Boneshadow Irakka
Lash-of-the-softest-Truth - Harmony 10 Firetouched, ex Irakka, ex Bloodtalon.
Mayflower - Thyrsus, Guardian, Crazy gungirl
Wednesday - Moros, Apostate
Astarte - Mastigos, Guadian, Bitch.
Flux - Obrimos, Mysterium, Archaeomancer.
Krystal - Fairest, Muse, Autumn Court, Bishopric of the Blackbird
Alice - Darkling, Autumn Court, crazed sociopath.

Wow, thats alot of characters.

So, my birthday has come and gone again for another year, and apart from one, humongous problem that I don't feel like getting into right now, it was pretty awesome.

Have you ever had a crush on someone, and just when you are starting to get over it and move on, they do something that makes it worse than ever? I am in that place right now, and no, I am not talking about James. I guess I will just have to wait and see. I am almost entirely sure that this guy is not serious relationship material, but maybe there can be some fun. I am feeling quite... frisky I guess is the term.

Melbourne is not too bad. The longer I spend here, the more I like it. I still miss Sydney, and there are still days when I want to run away, but there is alot tying me here now. It is really quite interesting.

I generally fail at updating this thing. I know, I am lazy. :P

Thanks to everyone for their birthday well wishes. I really did have an awesome weekend, and an awesome couple of days.

I cleared out all my photos, so here are some flickr links of random things. I have to rotate, title and comment them, I know.

Photos Clubbing with my sister Elyssia, Simon, Alicia and Fergie

Sydney October Mage and Vampire

Melbourne October Vampire, just a couple

Talk to you all later

That comic seems to sum up my mood.

I am leaving Sydney in about half an hour and heading back to Melbourne. Melbourne is an interesting town. I seem to be having a weird sort of relationship with it. When I am not talking to anyone from Sydney, I love it there. The second I talk to someone from Sydney, I hate it.

Meh.

I miss you all.

Especially you. You know who you are.

I need your help!

First things, it is coming up to my birthday, and there is a tradition. Every year, around my birthday, a group of my friends and I each put together a cd of songs that are good to have sex to, and we swap CD's. So I need all of you to help me pick 20 songs. I have 2.

1. Massive Attack - Teardrop
2. The Decemberists - A Cautionary Tale (Weird I know, but meh)

Also, you are all hereby invited to help me celebrate said birthday. Friday the 9th of November, there will be dinner at Sophia's in Camberwell, here in Melbourne. Saturday is a Cam day, followed by much clubbing. And then on the Sunday there is a picnic in a park. I want you all to come. If you are coming from interstate, let me know and I will find someone to put you up.

So I am back from my weekend in Adelaide, and it was awesome. I totally fell in love with the city, and am pondering moving there after Christmas, if I dont head back to Sydney.

Work is ok. A little boring, but thats not too bad I suppose.

I am looking forward to Con, it will be good to catch up with all my Sydney friends.

I hate countrylink, and trains in general.

I am still in Sydney, pondering giving up on every getting to Melbourne, and just going straight to Adelaide. I rang around today, and can have a dozen job interviews lined up for next week, more than I had in Melbourne.

Have I mentioned I hate things?

Went to see James, and he seems ok, all things considered. It was nice to just hang out.

Thank You For Smoking is an awesome movie. Thanks to James for showing me this.

This week has been an eye opener.

There is something I have been wrestling with all week, and on Friday, it came crashing down around me. Its amazing how one persons pain can heal your own.

I can go to Melbourne, and then onto Adelaide with a clean conscience.

I can't even describe how good that feels, and how guilty I feel at the same time that I am not guilty at all.

I love you too.

So, on Monday, I am moving to Melbourne.

I feel like I should do something, only I don't know what.

People who want to catch up, let me know, although bare in mind that I have very limited cashflow at the moment.

See most of you at game on Saaturday.

So, Sexpo has come and gone another year. It was fun. not quite as fun as last year, but meh.

Thursday night there was a gig. Went, drank, didn't actually get to see the band I wanted too. Doesn't matter, there was sex. Good sex. Twice.

Friday night hung out with Doug, that was nice.

Sunday night with Riley, far too tired.

Melbourne was awesome. I am thinking of moving to Adelaide next year, when my term as VST is up.

This whole break up thing has taught me alot about exactly where I stand with alot of people, especially people who I thought were my friends. Fuck you all, you know who you are. In fact, alot of you read this.

Blah :P

Well, I am single again. James just broke up with me in Hyde Park, an hour before I have another job interview. Because I am the biggest source of instability in his life apparently.

So... What now?

I am going to fight the initial urge to move to Canberra instead of coming back to Sydney. This sucks, but who knows, maybe I can be happy here again.

I don't really know what to do, but I have a job interview at 3, so I need to keep myself together.

Hurrah for perfect fucking timing.

OK, so, now I am sober, incredibly hungover, and have photos to share with you. I look horribly drunk trying to dance.

Urgh.

So, what happened, we were all sitting around drink. I had had about a bottle of Jim beam. In walks Dan, a friend in the army, with 5 bottles of Jim Beam blue label. Pete instantly hands me one and dares me $500 to drink the whole thing in one skull.

Which I did. Oh god the burning.

Luckily, there was no vomitting.

Canberra gaming weekend photoset

Leeton Party photos. Don't laugh at how drunk I look.

I am so, so very drunk. I am sorry if parts of this don't make sense, I cant really feel my fingers, or see the keyboard, I am trustin gto my touch typing ability.

I miss James. I know it is cliche, but I do. Tonight has been quite weird. as most of you know, I am in my home town, and when I am in my home town I am generally a rather different person. Ia m far more relaxed for stathers. and yeah, I have completely different friends.  and of god it is reaqlly hard to type at the moment.
 
so, there ws a party tonight. i took lots of photos. i will upload them when sober. there are photos of me dancing like a hooker. i havent done that for a long time. maybe i shouldg et back into it. it would solve my cahs flow problems.

I really miss james. i turned down alot of sex tonight, which is odd for me. previosly, in other relationships, i would totally have gone for it and not felt bad, but even flirting leaves me with this odd empty feeling. maybe i am actually happy for the first time in a while.

wow.

I sound horribly cheesy when drunk.

oh god, sleep now.

love you james, even though i doubt you will reaad this.

Well, I am back from Canberra, and I will post stuff including photos about that this afternoon. I slept from about 7 till about 12, so now I am awake, and lacking things to do, so I decided to do some survey type things that I got tagged for. I normally don't do these things, but I am bored.

List ten things you want to say to people but know you never will.

- Don't say who they are.
- Disable comments.
- Never discuss it again

Some of these are about the same person. Some aren't.

And don't ask me about this on MSN, I will not discuss it. I may talk to a couple of you about it irl, but those of you who I will know who you are.

1. I love you. From the depths of my soul. Every time I speak to you, even when its not under good circumstances, I realise that more and more. It's not really a romantic love, but I can not define it.

2. I hate the way our falling out is made to be my fault. I am not the only one who gave up you know. It takes two.

3. I won't ever be able to thank you enough for all the advice you have given me.

4. I hate how inadequate you make me feel. I know that I will never be perfect, but my best efforts should be enough for you.

5. I hate the way one look from you can have me so turned on I want to tie you to a bed and hear you moan my name over and over. And you encourage it.

6. I hate the way you go against the very grain of my soul, and yet, when I toss up the consequences, your continued presence in my life is still worth it.

7. I am sorry that I don't feel the same way about you that you do about me. You are a great guy, really, but not what I am looking for. And I am definately not what you need.

8. You have more inner strength than you realise. Sometimes I just feel like grabbing you and shaking you until you realise it.

9. For once, why can't we both want the same thing?

10. We can't hold you up forever, learn to stand on your own two feet.

( Long surveyish thingy )

Well, tomorrow morning, falsely_accused and I will descend upon Canberra for a weekend of rampaging, card games, and silliness.

Looking forward to it muchly.

Lost my job, and I am finding it difficult to care. I will be back in Sydney at the beginning of August, assuming I can find somewhere to live.

Got dragged to the doctors this week by concerned friends. All new anti-depressants, and a cocktail of anti-psychotics, because apparently I am a textbook Psychopath. I argued with the doctor long and hard about these. Generally, most of the ones he has given me are used to treat Schizophrenia. Going to get a second opinion before I put any of those things in my mouth.

Looking forward to this weekend so much!

I hate, hate, HATE my little sister.

There is a 95% chance I have lost my job. I find out tomorrow.

My sister and I ran into each other in the street, where she proceeded to yell at me, and then slap me. So I punched her. A fight ensued which was broken up minutes later by the police.

Long story short, I now have assault charges and a court appearance. Wonderful. I rang my work to do the honest thing and tell them of said court appearance, and now it looks like I am fired.

I am seriously considering uping Assault to Homicide.

I hate my sister. Stupid fucking Emos.

Well, I got job stuff sorted. I am now only going for a year, and at the end of that year, I can decide what I want to do. I took a pay cut, and my itinery has changed, but I still get to come back at the times that I wanted too. THe guys were actually really good about it. I think they realized that with all the convincing it took to get me into the job, a year was better than me walking away.

Life should be feeling better, but its not. I hate this. Now I know I can be an overly emotional person, and sometimes I overreact to things, but other people have been pointing out the problems in my relationship as well. Is it really that bad?

Urgh... It is 1:30 almost, and I have to be up in 4 hours. >.<

I hate life.